I can think of countable moments in my life when my heart was touched by something, truly, deeply. As the human condition has it, these moments are all about my Self. ‘Who am I?’, a question everyone asks, one way or another. We strive to know that Self, it is a quest, in every journey, in every myth, whatever the culture. It is, apparently, human.

But, if every Self is sought after, does this mean we are all looking for the same thing? Could it be that the Self is actually one giant entity, a ball of fire, or however you imagine it, that binds us all together? Could we all be one with one another, or one with the world in which we, and that Self, exist? How do we know ‘what’ we’re looking for when we do not know what it is? How do we know it’s ‘there’?

These existential questions come back to me now as I’m pushed to think back to what has brought me here in the first place. And by ‘here’, I mean what I do – in the general sense of the word. It was the passion to find my Self, but also to know what finding my Self actually means. Why is this Self important to me? Why is it important to anyone? Why do I/we spend so much of our time, energy, and emotions trying to find it? Is this what distinguishes us from machines? Whatever the answers are, there’s a bitter-sweet awakening that comes with these questions. The huge potential each of us carries expands us outward (and that’s the sweet bit), while the unworthiness we feel within the small boundaries of the bodies we carry pulls us inward (that’s the bitter bit). And in between, there’s a psyche that is pushed and pulled, constantly out of balance, wondering when and how it will all end.

But, it is not all doom and gloom. At the centre of this ebb and flow, there is one beam of light through which the Self shines. There is one bubble that no potential or boundary can touch. There is one little spot that is immune to all storms. It stays there. Forever. And that is where passion comes from, I believe. Where true laughter resides. Where nothing, absolutely nothing, can be spoiled. However, that spot can be covered by debris from the storms around it. It may be hidden for a while, until something, or someone (could be our selves, our will, or our doing) calms our storm. That is when we uncover it. When we discover it, and we call it ‘passion’. And then more storms come along, by accident, or by our own doing. And the spot seems to disappear, until something or someone calms the storms, and we then re-discover it.

It is in the storms starting, raging, then calming, that we find that spot. It is in this cycle that passion appears and reappears. But we can also help it by loving and accepting the storms. By accepting that we are not machines, we are not formulas, we are not fixed. Inside each and every one of us, there is constant movement of thoughts, emotions and existence, circulating around these frames we call bodies, inside and outside. The movement can be slow and peaceful, or it can be fast and raging. But the movement revolves around an essence only we know, one that is special to each and every one of us. To find it, uncover it, discover it, and rediscover it, may well be the ongoing true purpose of our being. We might never have an end to reach, but we have a hell of a ride to make the most of.

Have you rediscovered your passion yet?!